I'm Really Trying

Really, I am. What am I trying to do, you might ask? Write! I'm sitting in my ugly orange velvet chair, with my little desk, a bottle of ice cold water, music playing softly in the background, my notebooks all open and ready...and yet I am stumped. *sigh* It's driving me batty!

I have a whole world basically thought up, a story ready to be told and I got nothin'. I hate it when this happens to me. It doesn't help that it's really muggy and my room feels like it's a thousand degrees. *sigh* I know, I'm whining.

Okay, here's me turning off the internet and being a good girl. I will thrill or disappoint y'all tomorrow with my many words (or lack thereof). Wish me luck! *whimper*

I am SOOOOO Tired!

Stupid heatwave. *sniffle* It's much cooler today, but the humidity is higher. Thus, I'm miserable. :( And it doesn't help that heat always ends up giving me a headache. *sigh*

Yesterday we had some trippy lightning come through town. It was the craziest shade of green/gray. Lasted for about 2 hours and then went away. Can I just say how much I hate lightning? I remember as a kid all the neighborhood kids would tease me by telling me that lightning always struck the tallest thing standing. So, to this day I still scrunch my shoulders to make myself smaller, even though I know that's not exactly why lightning would strike me. *eye roll*

I have a bunch of errands to run, but I have no get up and go. I got up at 10:45, ate some amazing bread my next-door neighbor brought us and have been sitting in my room writing ever since. It's pathetic, I tell you!

I'm also thinking of taking my laptop with me. I'd like to find an air-conditioned restaurant or something where I can sit and type in peace for awhile. It'd also be nice to just be cool for a bit too. :) I hate feeling like I'm going to melt. It's really not pleasant.

Have any of you tried those fruit freeze thingies from Taco Bell? I'm not too fond of the mango one, but the strawberry one is really good. It's like a really good slurpee. :) And it's got strawberries on top. Yum!

I only work 3 days this week! Whee! I plan on doing nothing this coming weekend. I'll get to watch fireworks, which really isn't all that exciting. I mean, I could trek down to the waterfront or watch the ones in Vancouver, but I don't really care to spend my 4th surrounded by a bunch of people I don't know. Thanks, but no thanks.

Today over on our dik blog, we've got Jeri-Smith Ready. I've never read her stuff before, but she seems really cool. Maybe I should look up her stuff? My day should be coming up relatively soon. My answers seem really dull now that I think about it. *sigh* I'm boring!

Well, enough procrastinating! I'm off! Gotta go take a shower and such. Have a great day everyone!

So, I totally stole this from Kristie J/Katie(babs)

But I'm okay with that! :)







All I can say is Mrowr! :




And this one too. Man, the guy with long hair has a beautiufl body, but his lips drive me wild. Yummy!






And this one is just funny! I totally...well, never mind. he-he

Ugh

This weather is killing me! It's been hotter than hot these last few days. Now, it's cooling off, though the house still feels like a sauna. *sigh* We had a thunder and lightning storm earlier and it's cooler outside than in, but whatever.

I've had a very boring weekend so far. I beat MGS4 last night! All I can say is whoa! Talk about twists and turns that I totally wasn't expecting. :) I'm not complaining though. However, I hated the end. I mean, it wasn't bad, but it wasn't as good as I'd hoped. I know, I'm picky. :(
Over-all I rate it a B+. The mini-movies could have been edited out and it would have been much better. :)

Tomorrow I've got some little things to do. I'm hoping I can get them all done. I have to send some stuff off in the mail, pick up some stuff, just little things.

Ciara emailed me with an interesting question. Sounds like Powell's Books here in Portland is having a Midnight Party for Stephanie Meyers (of Twilight fame) on August 1st. Since I really only liked the 1st book in the series, I don't know if I'd go. One of the temps we had during the winter season LOVES the Twilight books, so I texted her and let her know. I'm almost 100% she'll be going. :)

Oh, this heat's going to kill me. Yuck!

I'm Really Thirsty

So you'd think I'd go get something to drink. Ha! Me, get up? Are you serious? LOL!

Actually, I'm in a really good mood tonight. Do I know why? I wish. Just had a good day. I finished reading Night Keepers by Jessica Andersen. Another total mind trip. The world-building was amazing, but the 2 main characters drove me nuts! My review is here. I gave it a C+. I liked it, but didn't think it was the best book ever written. The action was intense and stuff, but the romance just didn't do anything for me. I think she should skip romance from now on and stick with urban fantasy. I think she'd totally kick butt doing that.

I only work 3 days next week! Score! I took Saturday off, so I'll have a 4-day weekend! *happy dance* Pathetically enough, I won't be doing anything, but whatever. *sigh* Aw well, it's 4 days to relax and unwind. Won't have any more vacation until September when my b-day rolls around. *sniffle*

Went and bought more books today. Yes, I'm sad. :) I don't remember what I bought, but aw well. I know I bought 6 books, so that's good. Actually, it was kind of funny, because I was getting ready to leave when I saw this girl in goth clothing wandering up and down the romance aisle. She looked a bit lost, so I asked her if she was looking for anything specific. She said not really, so I asked her what she liked to read. She told me paranormals. Ding! :)

So, I started pulling out books. I showed her Slave to Sensation by Nalini Singh, The Rest Falls Away by Colleen Gleason, the Immortals after dark series by Kresley Cole, Dragon Fire by Deborah...um, brainfarting on her name. Crap! And a couple others. I also gave her my blog addie for goodandbad books. We shall see. She told me how much she appreciated my feedback. That she really wanted to read something good, but didn't know where to start. I am so bad. he-he

It's supposed to be around 100 tomorrow. Ugh! I'll be at work until 4 and then I'm coming straight home. I think taking a nice shower will be a good thing. I plan on cleaning my room. Yes, I know I say this every weekend, but this time I MEAN IT! There, I think I'm adamant enough. :)

Well, I should go to bed. It's getting late and I do have to work tomorrow. *sigh* Oh, and remember how I said I bought books 4-6 of Christine Warren's Ellora's Cave books? Well, I read them and they were really good. I love Rafe's story. It was so nice to see how the Felix got together with his witch. I just wish that his history had been delved into more. How did he become Felix? See, that's the one thing I don't like about 99% of erotica. Though they have these great potential, it's all overlooked for the sex. *sigh*


Good night, everyone!

Hokay...Here I Go Again

Huh...my brain is fried. I wonder why? Could it be that work has been a deadly bore? That I have no life? That I just read a great book that has since turned my brain into mush? How about all three? :)

Yes, work has been super boring. However, something...odd has happened. I've been given more responsibility at work. Yeah, it shocked me, too. I'm now the plus-size liason at work. Basically, since I've been the one pushing for more PS clothing, I'm the one the reps will go to if customers have questions and the like. Yee-haw! :) I'm not complaining. All I can say is, about time.

I have no life. I think it's clear that I don't. So, I wallow in self-pity and move on. *snicker* Sorry, just being stupid. :) I did go to Ellora's Cave yesterday & buy the remaining 3 Others/whatever she called them on EC books by Christine Warren. Unfortunately, the first 3 are out of print, but she says on her website that they will be out...one day. *sigh*

I read The Iron Hunt by Marjorie M. Liu. Reviewed it here. It was very trippy. I liked it, but my mind is still reeling from it. It was weird. Definitely Urban Fantasy, so there you go. If you like UF, I totally recommend it. :)

I got off work early today. Too bored to concentrate. I'm thinking I need to keep better occupied. We shall see. And I need to send my synopsis to a couple of people. I need some sort of kick in the pants to get this party started, so to speak.

Anybody have any plans for the weekend? I work tomorrow and Saturday. Saturday it could get up over 100 here, so ugh. Pay some bills, hang with family, maybe get together with friends. We shall see what happens.

Well, I'm off. Have a great night, everyone!

I've Been Tagged

Oh, Noes! Tracy tagged me. Bad, Tracy! :)


Pick up the book nearest you. Go to page 123. Write the 5th sentence. Easy-peasy



His first few years in ancient Greece, the demon had churned inside him, pulling his strings, leading him to slaughter and maim.


From The Darkest Pleasure by Gena Showalter. I will be reviewing here.


I tag Jana, Michele and whomever wants to join in the craziness. :)

I Was So Bad! :P

And I don't care! LOL! I went to go buy The Iron Hunt by Marjorie M. Liu (because I loves her) and ended up buying The Darkest Pleasure by Gena Showalter and Night Keepers by Jessica Andersen. Yes, it's a paranormal trifecta! :)

I haven't read any of them yet (shocking, I know) because we're dead slow at work and I'm trying to have SOMETHING to do. Otherwise I think I'd lose the few marbles I have left.

The one good thing about being slow at work is that I am getting writing done. I may not be inspired at all while at home, but with the deadly dull days I'm suffering from at work, it's giving me time to think. Yay me! :)

So far I've come up with a character sketch for my heroine and the basic overall plot for the story, but I need your help! Yes, you! :) I totally suck coming up with names for agencies and I really need one. My heroine (and future characters) works for a government agency that specializes in non-human governing. In the world I've come up with there are three types: humans, mages, and shape-shifters. My heroine is 100% human, but works for this agency that's not (reasons behind it, trust me). I'm looking for a cool sounding company & acronym for this story. Any suggestions? I had the MEA (magic enforcement agency), but that just covers the mages. I need both mages and the ss's. Thanks in advance my faithful readers! :D

Today was boring beyond belief, but the weather has been fabulous! Blue skies, cool breeze, warm sun. *sigh* I *heart* summer. :)

Well, I'm off. Going to try to keep myself occupied so I don't read my books. Trust me when I say they're calling out my name. I've been going thru a dry spell these last few weeks. Save me!?!

This Really Bugs Me

Do any of you remember the episode of Friends when the six of the went out, but Phoebe, Joey and Rachel couldn't afford the place? There was a lot of resentment, etc. that kicked in because of it all? Well, I've been going thru something kind of similar.

I've been up front on here about my financial woes. I'm not going to whine about them or anything, but it's basically common knowledge that I live paycheck to paycheck. I'm struggling to save up money to buy my own home and so I find it very difficult to do anything fun like travelling or going a crazy clothes shopping spree. Most of my friends are going thru the same thing, so we can all commiserate when the going gets tough.

What gets my goat are men. Actually, I think I'll call them boys because they certainly aren't acting like men. I've been blunt about my lack of dating experience on here too and maybe after this entry you'll understand it all a little more.

I was talking to a guy the other day and the discussion turned to travelling. I was saying how I'd love to travel anywhere, but that I just can't afford it. He asked me where I'd gone and I said I'd never been out of Oregon or Washington State. He actually scoffed at me like this was some big crime and became very belittling towards me. He said he thought it was pathetic I hadn't done any travelling and why didn't I go somewhere.

I have to say that I was very disturbed by this. For one thing, who is he to judge? For another, I can't AFFORD it! Sheesh. He's a computer engineer and makes major bucks, so he can afford to jet off where he wants when he wants. I don't think he understood the concept of a budget (or lack of one). I told him that I'm not made of money. That it is very difficult for me to think about dropping a couple hundred bucks just to fly somewhere. That if I made more money, I'd be happy to go somewhere, but that it's very difficult for me to do so.

So, to say I was embarassed by the whole thing is an understatement. Yes, I realize it's odd that I've never been out of my own state, but honestly? I can't afford to. I'm this close to being poor and if my parents hadn't been cool enough to let me move back home...well, I shudder to think where I'd be right now.

And the dream of owning my own home? With the way gas prices are rising to a ridiculous level and the price of just living day-to-day is getting out of hand...I honestly don't know if that dream is possible. But, I do know that it's nobody's business where I travel to or who I go with. It's enough for now to plan my ultimate travel. Maybe one day I might actually get to do the ultimate trip that's in my head.

My Day in Review

Basically, my day was boring. *sigh* Got up, went to work, almost dies b/c of paint fumes, came home, took a nap and now I'm playing online. It's pathetic, really. However, I did get a chance to do a basic outline of my story! Yay!

Had something kind of odd happen to me the other day. Years ago I worked with this guy. We became work buddies. He was married and I was NOT interested in him at all as anything other than a friend. A few years ago he got a divorce and made it quite clear that he was interested in me as something other than a friend. I let him know I wasn't interested and didn't want to pursue any relationship with him at all.

The man is peristent though. He keeps finding me through friends & such and will send me emails every now and then. He just found me on myspace and sent a friend request. I denied him, but here's my question. Why!?! You'd think after me repeatedly telling him I wasn't interested would get thru his thick skull. It's not like he's really harassing me, since I don't hear from him all that often, but honestly. *sigh*

It's a well-known fact by friends and such that I will not date men who were married before. Part of that is personal beliefs, but the big thing is that I don't want to deal with all of their excess baggage. I don't want to deal with the ex, any children, etc. I guess my thought is that since I've never been married, I want the same. Is that greedy? Maybe, but I'm not going to back down from that belief. Will I stay single forever? The way it's looking? Probably. LOL!

My mom bought the latest people & I was looking it over. For one thing, Mario Lopez as the sexiest bachelor? Um, no. Gerry Butler? Richard Armitage? Snoopy? Any of those are hotter than ML. Eesh. And they did a photo shoot with some brothers of celebrities. Can I just say that Chris O'Donnell's older brother is a hottie? He's all craggy and stuff. I don't like baby faces, so Chris never did it for me. His brother though? Mrowr!

The weather has been splendid all week long! I wish it'd stay like this for the rest of the summer. We shall see though. I'm not overly optimistic. :(

Well, I'm off. Going to play the Sims 2 for awhile and I hope to get to bed relatively early tonight. I really, really, really need to clean. :) Nite!

'Tis a Quickie

I'm a bit late, but that never hurt anyone...right? It was Katie(babs) b-day Friday. I wasn't able to get online before now to wish her a happy birthday, so happy b-day, Katie! :) Here's a little somethin' for ya! You can come up with your own little story on this pic. All I know is...I like the abs. :D

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!

La-di-da

So, I just got done playing MSG4 and though I haven't beaten the game, I have a few thoughts. First of all, enough with the mini-movies! I can't even begin to count how many of these little vignettes are throughout the game. Mind numbing, anyone? Secondly, I'm finding it odd how many of the big bosses are easy to kill in this game. So far the most difficult was one that ended up being easy after I figured out the big secret to beating her.

Graphically & visually, the game is a stunner, but watching all those movies makes my head hurt. Thank goodness I can skip over them! Am I missing major plot points? Probably, but enough is enough already! Sheesh!

I got off work at 5 today. We are DEAD! It's enough to make my brain feel like mush. *sigh*

I'm going thru a reading slump. I have nothing new to read until next week. What a bummer. I've reread all of my books so many times I could probably quote them if I wanted to. I'm finding it interesting what books I consider keepers and which ones I don't. I've got a major overhaul to do soon, which is just depressing. Lots and lots of books will be going bye-bye. *sniffle*

I found this great blog yesterday. I can't find the link, but when I do I'll post it here. It's basically a blog about bad grammar and somehow the lady gets pictures from all over the place that show bad grammar in use. It's really funny. :)

I had a guy somewhat bluntly ask me why I had been single for so long. Was it because I was ugly or was it by choice? LOL! What a jerk. I answered like I would anyone and said that A. it was none of his business and B. I could see why he was single. That didn't go over well. he-he

Well, I'm off. It was a gorgeous day today, but my room is really warm. I might pop my window open more and sleep with the bathroom door open. My room gets direct sunlight from sunup til sundown. *sigh* Makes for melting every summer. :(

I'm Eating Doritos

So, I'm being bad. I saw them at the store and they were calling my name. Shame on me! :P


Today was blah. I got up to find out that Chloe had run after a cat and my mom needed me to watch the boys whilst she went looking for the the little mutt. Couldn't find her, so asked me if I'd putt around in my car. I did that for a bit and came home feeling discouraged that I couldn't find her. Only to find out she'd come home. Argh! *headdesk* So, she's home, but I am soooo not happy with our doggy. Shame on her! She knows better.

Got to work way too early. I could've waited another half hour before leaving. *sigh* It was just a craptastic day to say the least. :(

I have something weird to talk about tonight. I've talked about my dreams in the past and how real they are. Well, I had a doozy the other night and when I woke up I was really sore. I won't go into the details of the dream (it was smokin' hot), but why would my back muscles be so sore if all I was doing was dreaming? Wouldn't it be weird if what I was dreaming was actually happening? That'd be a trip. But hey, at least I'd be getting laid!!! LOL! Sorry, that was bad of me. :D

I'm all out of books, so I've been doing a lot of rereading...again. It's something to pass the time.

I got nothin' to say. So, I'm off to play MGS4. Should be fun! :)

*Warning* Major Rant Ahead

Bridget's not a happy camper. Here's why. I hate people who discuss politics. There, I said it. I know, we're in the midst of an election year, so it's only natural that people would be talking about politics. I'm okay with that, if it's done somewhere not near me.

My biggest complaint are people who are working who discuss the upcoming election. There are three things you do NOT talk about at work: sex, religion & politics. There's a simple reason for this; it causes controversy, hurt feelings and alienation. *sigh*

I stopped to go get gas today after running some errands. The guy running the pumps (we are legally not allowed to pump our own gas in Oregon...I do not know why) was standing there talking at full volume about all of the political candidates. He was giving his opinion to all of us stuck there waiting for our gas to pump. I finally spoke up and told him that I didn't appreciate being forced to listen to his opinions. That if he wanted to talk about that he should NOT be doing it at work.

I personally do not discuss politics with anyone. It's nobody's business who I choose to vote for. I don't want to know your opinion. If I do, I'll ask. It's not something that should be discussed in an area where a lot of people can hear. It definitely should not be discussed at full volume so the whole world can hear.

I'm sorry, but this is a major pet peeve. I have a coworker who basically accosted all of us in '04 to not only ask if we had voted on November 2nd, but who we voted for. She did it to customer's too. I finally had to go to management to tell them that she needed to be shut up. Rude, rude, rude! Sheesh!


Okay, my rant is now over. Now on to your regularly scheduled programming.

Oy

So, it's been a couple days since I blogged. No excuses really, just haven't had a lot to say. Since I can't really get online at work anymore, my internet time is now specifically at home and I can't always get online. It sucks, because I love going to friends blogs and catching up on their lives.

Speaking of blogs, the lovely Sarai is a genius. :) We did the whole DIK thing a month or so ago and I know some of us were missing it. So, she created a blog! Yup, our very own DIK blog. Yay us! :) Here's the link. She's still working out the kinks, but I think it'll end up being a lot of fun. Hot men, good books and friends. Can't say anything bad about that! :D

I'm doing well. The weather has been beautiful these last few days. It's expected to be nice tomorrow and then the weather will go back to being blah again. That'll probably last thru July 4th (as it does every year *sigh*) and then it'll be gorgeous thru Halloween. Yes, Oregon weather is weird. :)

My sinuses have been a bit upset (understatement) this year. I just can't seem to shake the sinus pressure. *sigh* I'd love to go even a week without feeling like my head is stuffed full of cotton.

I went and picked up my copy of Metal Gear Solid 4 for the PS3 on Thursday. So far it rocks. I've played about 10 hours total and am about halfway thru Act 3. It's difficult going, but I'm enjoying it. If I have any complaints it's that there are too many "movies" throughout. The graphics are amazing and the gameplay is very similar to the other three games. It's interesting to visit old characters. :) So, as of right now I'd rate the game a solid B. :)

I just finished reading the first 3 books in Lynn Viehl's Darkyn series. First of all, how on earth can they be considered romances? Urban fantasy would be a better descriptive. For one thing, the romance is almost nil and for another, there is way too much stuff going on in the books. Is it the continuing saga of Alex & John Keller or is it individual romances? Inquiring minds would like to know. I'm still not sure. *sigh*

Well, I'm off. I want to play the Sims 2 for awhile. I also need to clean tomorrow. I've put it off for too long and my room is beginning to resemble a pigsty. Have a great night everybody!

I'm Freezing!

And it's probably because I'm laying here in nothing but a bra & panties. When I got home from work I was sweltering and now I'm shivering. Go figure. *eye roll*

Today was not too shabby. It went by way too slow, but other than that it was bearable. :)

I bought some more expansion packs for the Sims 2. Yes, I have a sickness. It is called the Sims. Sheesh. I don't really care about "playing" the game as much as I do designing and decorating the houses. That's the best part. :)

I'm rereading my Nalini Singh books. Man, I love those books. Sexy, fun, sexy...well, you get the drift. I cannot wait for the next book in the series. I admit, I was very disappointed in Mine to Possess, but that's just because the heroine bugged me so much. Here's hoping the next one is much better.

I haven't written at all for awhile now. I don't know what's wrong with me. *sigh* I have a bunch of ideas in my head, but the want to write just isn't there. I need something to jolt me, I think. Anyone have any ideas?

I stopped by the store after work to pick up some foodstuffs for my lunches. Freddy's has these great ciabata (I can't spell that right) sandwiches. I love that type of bread, so I bought one. :)

I'm feeling very blue tonight. Not depressed, just blue. Every now and then I just get so blahed out by life in general. I think I need to get together with friends to jumpstart my happy vibe. I was talking to a friend of mine who said she hopes to go visit friends during the RWA convention. I would love to go, but I'm too poor. Maybe next year? However, I'm not a member of the RWA so I can't seem to get my head wrapped around the expense or justify it. So, I'll wait until I'm too old to care. :)

Sarai has started a new blog for all of the us DIKer's. It should be a lot of fun. I get to discuss why I chose my books and my heroes. Yay me! Here's hoping we can add more as time progresses. I think that would be cool. :)

Well, I'm off. Time to get ready for bed. Have a great night everybody!

Huh...

I was over on Ciaralira (keeruh) blog and she was raving about the books by Ilona Andrews. Ilona actually popped over there & commented telling Ciara that she could get an ARC of the next book. I told Ciara how lucky she was & well...Ilona told me I could have one too. LOL! Fascinating how that all works out, isn't it?

I am so miserable! Stupid sinuses. That's all I'm going to say.

Read Lover Enshrined twice. Reviewed it. Liked it. Was better than the last one, that's for certain. Anyone else wish Qhuinn and Blay would hook up for reals or is that just me?

Um, not much else going on. Took medication, but it's not working. *sigh*

Was going to clean today. Didn't happen. I'm so lame.

Played the Sims 2 for awhile. They've got a new expansion pack coming out in August. It's apartment life which thrills me to pieces. A real apartment! It's about time!

Not much else going on in my neck of the woods. I should go slather some Icy/Hot on my head and neck, pull my covers up over my head and see if I can get to sleep. *sigh*

Nite everybody!


PS. Jana-Give your niece a hug for me. What wonderful news. :)

Love Is In The Air...

Love is everywhere...except here, with me. *sigh* I need to stop watching romantic movies. All it does is bum me out. Aw well, whatever. Maybe, just maybe, one of these days I will find the man for me. Right? I'll keep that thought up anyway. If I don't I might end up depressing myself even more. LOL!

I was a lazy bum today. Sad as it sounds I did absolutely nothing & it was grand! After a very, very, very busy week, I got home from work yesterday & could barely funtion. I ended up going to bed at 9:30. I woke up at 6:30 this morning to use the potty and went back to bed. I didn't officially get up until almost 1 this afternoon. I don't feel too bad though, because I slept like crap all week long. My body needed the sleep.

Other than watching romantic movies, I played the Sims 2 and played with Chloe dog. I know, my life is soooooooo exciting. :P

Tomorrow I'm off to get the eyebrows done and do a little bit of shopping for lunches and such. Friday I should be able to go pick up the new Metal Gear Solid game. Thank goodness I paid for it in advance. If I hadn't, I'd have to wait for a couple of paychecks. *sigh*

It was very pretty for most of the day today. The sun was out when I woke up and it was pretty warm all day. I hope it'll last through the week at least. Portland weather is odd anyway. Never know what it's going to do.

Here's a question for all of you. Did you read the Sweet Valley books when you were a kid? I was going to mention this site I'd come across awhile ago, but I totally spaced it. Anyway, this woman has gone back and read all of the SV books and reviews them. Oy! Some of them are so funny! I loved those books when I was a kid, but now, when reading the reviews, I wonder what I ever saw in them. Here is the link. I recommend going back to the beginning and reading all the way through. Truly one of the funniest sites I've been to in a LONG time.

Well, I'm off! Have a great night everybody!

Huminahuminahumina

• Work was insanely busy; life not so much. I worked a 40 which is normal for most people, but not for me. Yes, my life is weird.

• Bought the latest Christine Warren book (good) and Lover Enshrined by JR Ward (hmmm). Read both. Trying to wrap my mind around LE. Crazy nonsense like usual, but there you go.

• Had to be at work at 7:30. Would not be so bad if this was my normal schedule, but it's not. Therefore, I am tired. :(

• Wishing I drank coffee or pop, but thankful for my weight loss. Yes, that makes sense...I think.

• Really, really broke until Friday. Finding this sad as I have things I'd like to do. Contemplating curling up in dark cave and not emerging unless good book sale comes up.

• Going to go play the Sims 2 now. Dreaming of caffeine and a good book.

I've Said It Before

And I'll say it again. I think I've got the world's largest kick me sign on my back. Why is it that I'm the one who is always singled out & picked on? Is it because I'm the weak one in the herd or what?

Today was hell. I won't go into all of the details because they are stupid, but I was falsely accused and if there's nothing I hate more in life, it's that. It would be so nice if certain people would make sure they're accusing for something legitimate before opening their mouths and inserting foot.

I'm angry, I'm frustrated, I'm sick unto death of this person & this whole situation. I don't like what's going on but feel powerless to change it. It's something that I've been dealing with for over four years and I'm sick beyond belief of the whole asinine thing. I wish this person would just up and disappear.

I hate hurtful, stupid people and I'm especially sick of having them be above me in what I do. I'm sick of having to bite my tongue and not tell them exactly what I think. I'm sick of the whole thing and just want to get out! I'm just so tired.

Maybe I need to stand up for myself, but I have no idea how to do it. The person that drives me crazy is someone that is pretty much loved by upper management. I don't know what to do. I just needed to rant because I'm not sure what else to do. *sigh*




PS. Jana-Can I have your new address?? :)

Dream A Little Dream For Me

I've talked on here before about how odd my dreams are. Well, the last 2 nights have been real doozies. I can't remember the whole dream, but the part that sticks out in my mind is this...

In my dream, it's more like I'm watching a movie. I am not doing any of it (and I never would). The scene is Mt. Hood. A beautiful, crystal clear early spring day. A woman is on the chair lift (but it's not a chair, it's just a thin bar, kind of like a trapeze) and she's going around in circles. Just as she reaches the push off point, she flips over backwards, hangs by her knees and then starts sliding chest first down the mountain. By the time she reaches the bottom, her boobs are huge because a ton of snow has made its way into her top. I know, it's weird. I've had the dream two nights in a row. Why? And the funniest thing? I actually woke myself up by giggling yesterday morning.

I'm hanging out at home today. I was going to do a bunch of errands, but since I'm not especially inspired, I am hanging out here today. *sigh* I AM getting my eyebrows done later on though. I may not be the girliest woman in the world, but I refuse to have caterpillar eyebrows! Hideous thought!

I read an interesting article over on the SB's about the future of "real" books. I personally am not a huge fan of e-books. I don't like the fact that I'm stuck reading it just on my computer. And if I'm being completely honest (which I usually am), I love the feel of a book in my hand. The black ink on my fingers from the print rubbing off. The smell of a bookstore when I first walk in. The knowledge that it is somethng tangible for me to take with me wherever I go. I know a lot of people like the convenience of ebooks, but sometimes reality is better than convenience.

I'm thinking of working on some plotting for my book(s). Why do I go out of my way to make my worlds so complicated? Why can't it be simple? I dunno, but honestly there are times I wonder why I do this to myself. *sigh*

I was thinking about taking some non-credit courses at PCC. One is called writing romance. It'd be an online class taught by author Lori Wilde. The other is beginning novel writing. Both are online. Since I don't get off work until 7, taking a class is really difficult. I've been thinking about it. Am I ready to go back to school? Even for a noncredit class? I'm just not sure. I'm trying so hard not to stifle myself. I want to broaden my horizons, but sometimes fear is a funny creature. It does weird things to a person's brain. *sigh* I guess I will see what happens.

The weather is overcast and a bit chilly today. Friday ended up being quite nice and Saturday wasn't too shabby. Oregon weather is just weird anyway. It's bizarre to have 89 degree weather one day in August and ten minutes later a rain shower will come through. But I love it here. It's so pretty and lush and green. When I drive home from work every night (when it's clear) I can see Mt. Hood and Mt. St Helen's in the distance. The city is surrounded by extinct volcanoes and there are trees everywhere. Driving into Downtown Portland, a person must drive over a bridge to get there. The Willamette (Will-am-et) River divides the city in half (east & west). You just need to choose which of the (I think it's nine) bridges to drive over.

The streets are usually lined by wildflowers or trees (usually trees). In the summertime, the weather can get hot, but the humidity stays pretty low. There are bike paths and hiking paths all over the place. If you're looking for a nice place to watch the world go by, the Waterfront is probably the best place to do it. You can wander down the path or stop in a trendy restaurant. You can find great shops or play in the big fountain. You can walk with your kids or with your significant other along the main streets of downtown.

If you're really lucky, you can go up to the famous Rose Garden. As crazy as this may sound, I've only walked through it once, but the scenery (and the roses) is beautiful. You can walk through China Town or talk the streetcar through some of the "cooler" parts of Portland. Or you can go through the Hawthorne District, which is full of cool shops, great restaurants and is the place to be seen if you're young and trendy.

Or you could take the MAX from Hillsboro to Gresham. It's not the shortest ride by any means, but it's peaceful and fun.

Or, if you're really lucky, you can take the weekend off and go to the beach or the mountains or the desert, which are all within an hour of this great city. How did I ever get so lucky to live here? And that, dear reader, is a brief glimpse into the city of Portland. :) Sorry, did mean to get all tourist guide on you. Was just thinking about it and thought why not?

Well, I'm off! Have a great day everyone!

Sometimes I Really Hate Being a Woman

And today is one of them. I don't know why it is that I sometimes get so emotional. I mean, it's hormones and all that, but honestly. I just sat here and had a good cry because of something my mom posted on her blog. *sigh*

I've had an emotional reading epiphany-like experience this weekend. Last week I bought The Lost Duke of Wyndham by Julia Quinn. Never read her before, loved the book, gave it an A in my review, and promptly went out to by the entire Bridgerton series. And I read all 8 books in 1 and a half days. I'm sick, I tell you, but you know what? It was an amazing experience. Each book was so good in it's own way. Though I have to say that Colin & Penelope's story was my favorite...or was it Daphne & Simon? Or Gregory & Lucy? Each one stands on its own and I am so glad I "found" them! *sigh*

I'm really an emotional wreck this weekend. If I see anything that's even the remotest bit senitmental, I'm sobbing like a baby. *sniffle* I hate being emotional. It sucks! :(

Tomorrow we get the babies full-time. SIL goes back to work & my mom will have TWO babies to deal with. Dylan the holy terror and Cooper the darling baby munchkin. :) Okay, so Dylan isn't necessarily a holy terror, but the kid has no fear...and he's discovered mud and rain and puddles and the great outdoors. It's a miracle he hasn't committed some crazy random act of distruction yet. LOL! Give him time...I'm sure it'll happen. He's only 2, but he's bigger than most 4 year olds. But I love him. Very much so. :)

I was emailing w/ my buddy Tracy & I was telling her about this weird Story Idea and/or odd dream I had last night. My subconscious is so weird. It'll come up with the strangest things just as I'm at that point of almost sleep w/ a hint of awareness. Anywhoo...I had this idea for a bizarre historical romance. In it, this crazy old Earl or Duke or...well, anyway, he continually marries, breeds and loses his wife in childbirth. It happens 5 or 6 times w/ nothing but girls. He's desperate for an Heir, but each of his wives dies w/o giving him one.

And that's not the weird part of the story idea. What was odd were the crazy names that popped into my head for the names. Hydrangea was the biggie. And she goes by Ann or maybe Heidi. See, I'm nuts! LOL!

Why is it that I get inspired at night when I should be sleeping? I think if I lived on my own, this would be when I'd be doing my cleaning or organizing or whatever. I'm so not a morning/daytime person. My brain doesn't start functioning until about 2 or so. Ugh!

And I've got the week from hell coming up. 40 hours...and since I'm not the biggest fan of my job right now? That's like pulling teeth or something.

Speaking of pulling teeth, I've got to make an appointment with my dentist. Actually, my dentist up and decided to retire unexpectedly last year, leaving me with his replacement. I'm very saddened by this b/c Dr. Wheeler? The bestest dentist ever! He'd been mine since I was 7. *sniffle*

Sorry, got sidetracked. I need to call & get my back right molar checked out. I think I need a root canal & it's freaking me out. My last one was a BAD experience, so I'm hoping to avoid that for certain sure.

Well, I'm off! Tired and I've got a ton of stuff to do tomorrow. Blah, blah, blah. Nite!