This cold sucks! I'm over the main cold; it's the coughing & nose-blowing I could do without. My sinuses don't know which end is up.
I'm tired and going to bed. Just wanted to say hi! *waves*
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Monday, October 11, 2010
I Can't Sleep
I seriously hate nights like this. For reasons unknown to me, my brain won't shut down and i'm all wound up. Bah!
I cut off 7 inches of hair today and immediately lost probably 10 pounds all at once. I tried to wait until I had enough to donate, but realized this morning that it was just too much. So, I made an appointment and cut it off. It's still just past my shoulders, so it's not like I went short or anything. :D
I'm not looking forward to going to work tomorrow. We've got 8 new temps coming in for the holiday season and as a senior rep, I get to train. Blech. 2 different reps; 6 hours for each of them. *sigh* doesn't my boss realize that i've already got a buttload of stuff going on & don't need the added aggravation? Argh!
But, I'm in an amazing mood. I'm still not ready to divulge just yet, but I'm happy. Am I a big enough tease? Heh.
I cut off 7 inches of hair today and immediately lost probably 10 pounds all at once. I tried to wait until I had enough to donate, but realized this morning that it was just too much. So, I made an appointment and cut it off. It's still just past my shoulders, so it's not like I went short or anything. :D
I'm not looking forward to going to work tomorrow. We've got 8 new temps coming in for the holiday season and as a senior rep, I get to train. Blech. 2 different reps; 6 hours for each of them. *sigh* doesn't my boss realize that i've already got a buttload of stuff going on & don't need the added aggravation? Argh!
But, I'm in an amazing mood. I'm still not ready to divulge just yet, but I'm happy. Am I a big enough tease? Heh.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
gah!
Uh, colds suck. I've got a nasty one, which is making my life miserable. *sigh* what else is new? Sheesh!
Other than being sick, I'm good. Work's busy. I'm busy. Yay!
I've got some stuff happening in my life that makes me very happy, but I'm not ready to talk about it yet. Oh, I'm being all secretive and stuff. Whoo! Heh.
Other than being sick, I'm good. Work's busy. I'm busy. Yay!
I've got some stuff happening in my life that makes me very happy, but I'm not ready to talk about it yet. Oh, I'm being all secretive and stuff. Whoo! Heh.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Your Help is Needed
Unless you've been living under a rock, you've heard of the terrible tragedy that occurred recently with a young gay man who jumped off the George Washington Bridge after a sexual encounter between him and another young man was filmed and broadcast by his roommate. No matter if you believe homosexuality is wrong or not, you should be enraged by the stupidity and ugliness of the situation. Bullying is wrong no matter what.
My friend Katiebabs wrote a beautiful blog entry and is pledging $1 a comment (up to $500) to two different charities. I've already commented & I hope you will too.
Today, however, I wanted to share my story and to let those of you out there who read my blog (and if you're just passing by) know, that it DOES GET BETTER!!!!!!
Bullying started young for me. In fact, I honestly don't remember any time in my childhood when I wasn't bullied. I was extremely tall for my age (5'10" by 5th grade) and was raised in a strict Christian upbringing where I didn't wear anything but skirts until I was 14. I was teased because I was awkward, tall and timid.
In kindergarden I was trapped inside the large playhouse we had by 2 other students who were egged on by the teacher. I was petrified and can remember screaming for help, but nobody came to my rescue. They kept me in there for what seemed like hours before finally letting me out because they got bored.
We moved that following summer and I remember hoping that things would get better, but they didn't. I started 1st grade and it started up immediately again. My biggest tormenter was a girl who lived down the street from me. Rhonda (yes, I'm naming names) was this short, obnoxious blond brat who lived to make my life hell. Every day at school it was something: my clothes, my height, my smarts...basically whatever it was she could tease me about. Because she was popular, it escalated because her "followers" wanted her to like them, so they started it up too.
6th grade was a much needed respite where my mom homeschooled me. It was the best I ever did in school and there are days even now that I wish it had continued until I graduated, but alas it was not in the cards. By 7th grade, I was back in public school and the bullying started up again, but this time it got physical.
The popular kids (including my old nemesis) hated me. I'll never know why, but they did. 8th grade was a nightmare of epic proportions and I remember ending that school year hoping and praying that high school would get better, but it didn't.
My first day of Freshman year, all the obnoxious bullies I'd dealt with in elementary AND middle school were there. The teasing and bullying started again. I didn't have anyone to turn to, so I started retreating more and more. I'm not aggressive, not really, and didn't know what to do to get them to just leave me alone. Now, it wasn't just girls who bullied me, it was boys too.
There was one boy in particular who took it way too far. His locker was right next to mine and I had to watch my back constantly, because if I was bending down to get something from the bottom of my locker, he'd come up behind me and shove me as hard as he could into my locker so that I'd bang my head against the back. He shoved me down an entire flight of stairs and it was only the grace of God that kept me from getting seriously injured.
My Junior year, one of the girls in my high school came out as a lesbian and my bullies decided that because I was tall and had never dated, that I was a lesbian too. The rumor passed like wildfire and it got so bad that as I'd walk down the hall people would stop talking and watch me walk by with absolute disgust on their faces. I didn't have any friends and was so far beyond miserable that I did contemplate suicide.
My Senior year in high school my brother started as a Freshman. My brother, completely opposite from me, fit in and had friends. He began hearing nasty rumors about me and felt that as my brother, he should defend me, but he also wanted me to know what was going on and told me.
It all came to a head about 3 weeks into the year. I was desperate. I didn't know who to turn to and remember I was in the car with my mom. I told her that I didn't know if I wanted to live anymore. It scared her so badly that she talked to my dad and they decided it would be best to let me drop out and get my GED. I still say to this day it's the only thing that saved me.
I dropped out and got my GED. I started working and finally got to see that not everyone was out to get me. I'm 34 and admit that it's taken me a long time to get over the damage done to my psyche by the kids I was bullied by. But, I want everyone to know, IT DOES GET BETTER.
There are days where I complain about things and how much I hate stuff, but the bullying does end. Ironically, the obnoxious brat who made my life hell got her just desserts. She ended up being in a physically abusive relationship and other awful things that...it's wrong of me to say, but I feel she deserved it. Does that make me an awful person? Probably, but you reap what you sow and unfortunately, she reaped nothing but misery.
If you're being bullied or tormented by your peers, do what I didn't. Talk to your parents, a counselor, your pastor...anyone. Do not let it fester until you feel like life's not worth living. Trust me, it is and it will get better.
One day you'll look back and realize that your life is awesome. You'll graduate from high school, maybe go to college. You'll get a degree and a great job. Maybe find a great partner/spouse. Have beautiful children (or not depending on if you want them or not :) ). Travel. See great things. DO great things. Don't allow these small-minded individuals to ruin your life. They're not worth it. YOU'RE WORTH IT. Just remember that.
My friend Katiebabs wrote a beautiful blog entry and is pledging $1 a comment (up to $500) to two different charities. I've already commented & I hope you will too.
Today, however, I wanted to share my story and to let those of you out there who read my blog (and if you're just passing by) know, that it DOES GET BETTER!!!!!!
Bullying started young for me. In fact, I honestly don't remember any time in my childhood when I wasn't bullied. I was extremely tall for my age (5'10" by 5th grade) and was raised in a strict Christian upbringing where I didn't wear anything but skirts until I was 14. I was teased because I was awkward, tall and timid.
In kindergarden I was trapped inside the large playhouse we had by 2 other students who were egged on by the teacher. I was petrified and can remember screaming for help, but nobody came to my rescue. They kept me in there for what seemed like hours before finally letting me out because they got bored.
We moved that following summer and I remember hoping that things would get better, but they didn't. I started 1st grade and it started up immediately again. My biggest tormenter was a girl who lived down the street from me. Rhonda (yes, I'm naming names) was this short, obnoxious blond brat who lived to make my life hell. Every day at school it was something: my clothes, my height, my smarts...basically whatever it was she could tease me about. Because she was popular, it escalated because her "followers" wanted her to like them, so they started it up too.
6th grade was a much needed respite where my mom homeschooled me. It was the best I ever did in school and there are days even now that I wish it had continued until I graduated, but alas it was not in the cards. By 7th grade, I was back in public school and the bullying started up again, but this time it got physical.
The popular kids (including my old nemesis) hated me. I'll never know why, but they did. 8th grade was a nightmare of epic proportions and I remember ending that school year hoping and praying that high school would get better, but it didn't.
My first day of Freshman year, all the obnoxious bullies I'd dealt with in elementary AND middle school were there. The teasing and bullying started again. I didn't have anyone to turn to, so I started retreating more and more. I'm not aggressive, not really, and didn't know what to do to get them to just leave me alone. Now, it wasn't just girls who bullied me, it was boys too.
There was one boy in particular who took it way too far. His locker was right next to mine and I had to watch my back constantly, because if I was bending down to get something from the bottom of my locker, he'd come up behind me and shove me as hard as he could into my locker so that I'd bang my head against the back. He shoved me down an entire flight of stairs and it was only the grace of God that kept me from getting seriously injured.
My Junior year, one of the girls in my high school came out as a lesbian and my bullies decided that because I was tall and had never dated, that I was a lesbian too. The rumor passed like wildfire and it got so bad that as I'd walk down the hall people would stop talking and watch me walk by with absolute disgust on their faces. I didn't have any friends and was so far beyond miserable that I did contemplate suicide.
My Senior year in high school my brother started as a Freshman. My brother, completely opposite from me, fit in and had friends. He began hearing nasty rumors about me and felt that as my brother, he should defend me, but he also wanted me to know what was going on and told me.
It all came to a head about 3 weeks into the year. I was desperate. I didn't know who to turn to and remember I was in the car with my mom. I told her that I didn't know if I wanted to live anymore. It scared her so badly that she talked to my dad and they decided it would be best to let me drop out and get my GED. I still say to this day it's the only thing that saved me.
I dropped out and got my GED. I started working and finally got to see that not everyone was out to get me. I'm 34 and admit that it's taken me a long time to get over the damage done to my psyche by the kids I was bullied by. But, I want everyone to know, IT DOES GET BETTER.
There are days where I complain about things and how much I hate stuff, but the bullying does end. Ironically, the obnoxious brat who made my life hell got her just desserts. She ended up being in a physically abusive relationship and other awful things that...it's wrong of me to say, but I feel she deserved it. Does that make me an awful person? Probably, but you reap what you sow and unfortunately, she reaped nothing but misery.
If you're being bullied or tormented by your peers, do what I didn't. Talk to your parents, a counselor, your pastor...anyone. Do not let it fester until you feel like life's not worth living. Trust me, it is and it will get better.
One day you'll look back and realize that your life is awesome. You'll graduate from high school, maybe go to college. You'll get a degree and a great job. Maybe find a great partner/spouse. Have beautiful children (or not depending on if you want them or not :) ). Travel. See great things. DO great things. Don't allow these small-minded individuals to ruin your life. They're not worth it. YOU'RE WORTH IT. Just remember that.
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